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i am starting to fall in love with modern musical theater. seriously, deeply, completely in-love with it. i’m already obsessed with bare and i love you because which are beautiful plays. but after hearing a friend sing one of their songs, i haven’t been able to stop listening to kerrigan-lowdermilk songs. i’m finding it hard to describe how completely sated my soul feels when i listen to beautiful songs, most especially songs from musicals. ao why don’t you just give these a listen and i dare you not to fall-in-love as well.

Two Strangers – Morgan Karr with Jay A. Johnson and Matt Doyle

And then it’s over.
Just another mistake done over.
There’s no evidence here,
No mark or picture frame.
Just a name in a cell phone,
Stuck in my head,
Smelling boy in my empty twin bed or maybe I’m just conjuring some romance I read.

Run Away With Me – Michael Arden

Run away with me.
Let me be your ride out of town.
Let me be the place that you hide.
We can make our lives on the go.
Run away with me.

Not A Love Story – Phoebe Strole

It’s not a love story.
It’s not a coming of age.
It’s not the kind of thing you put into a play.
It’s just a small story.
Just two friends all grown up.
It happens.
It happens.
It happens one day.

what’s so special about that date? well, i’m getting married! joke. haha! nope, i’m flying to singapore to watch Sara Bareilles live. yay! yay! yay! yay! yay! although my wallet is shouting, nooooooo!

upon hearing she was performing in asia, but not in manila, i spent a lot of time going back and forth in my head on whether or not to spend an obscene amount of money to watch her live. you already know which one i chose. i always wondered about people who fly in just to watch someone perform? well, now i understand. i just couldn’t let the opportunity to watch her possibly perform this live.

this is my song of the moment, by the way.

oh, and if you’re wondering who i’m watching with? well, i’m flying solo, watching solo and staying at a mixed dormitory hostel. exciting right? hahaha!

as i said earlier, May 11, is there any way for you to come sooner?

let me start by clueing you in on what i’ve been up to this past couple of months. early april, i finally stopped procrastinating and decided to take that first step to “living my dream” by signing up for a musical theater workshop. i’ve been trying to keep it on the down low since i don’t want a lot of my friends showing up for our showcase presentation come end of may. there’s so much i want to share about my experience so far, but i’m reserving another post for that (and hopefully, i’d have the time and energy to write it).

during one of the bonding sessions i spent with my classmates, we watched some of their old productions. one was bare, which they did last year. it’s about two gay high school students and their struggles at their private, catholic boarding school. to be honest, i wasn’t expecting much when i downloaded it out of curiosity. it took me by surprise when i instantly fell-in-love with it. here are some songs from the off-broadway recording…

you and i

You take my hand leaving me breathless
Feel the beat of my racing heart so you’ll understand
And know why we whisper in hallways
I’ll be with you always
Running together, forever you and I

best kept secret

I know this world can have a place for us
If we just try to find a way to trust that time will be kind
In a fantasy I dream, awake, but reality is give and take
You take what you can, you give time a chance
We have to wait until the world is fast asleep
I’ll wipe away your doubt
Show you why we keep
The best kept secret
The best kept secret…of all

touch my soul

I let them in, we make some noise
They let themselves out, thats their choice
Boys will be boys…
The phone won’t ring and I become some anicdote
And though I’ve had my fun, it gets lonely

But then came your kiss
And all I was missing was there in your eyes
Your lonely blue eyes
So please, say you’ll stay
Say you’ll never go away
My discarded heart has finally found a home
I know its love… you touch my soul

once in a while you listen to song that touches you in a way no other song has. i was trying to hold back tears when i first listened to this one. needless to say, i related so much to her situation. you know, a girl standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her. hahaha! 😛 seriously though, ivy is one of my dream roles now.

once upon a time

Once upon a time
I first held your hand
And love was not a crime
In a private world where
You said ‘don’t look down’
But then I did and now you’re lost above me


here’s the torrent. i highly recommend downloading it and listening to the entire thing. i’m sre you’ll fall-in-love with it like i did.

Kara DioGuardi and Jason Reeves

Lala Lala la la
Mmmmmm mmm
You by the light
Is the greatest find
In a world
Full of wrong
Your the thing thats right
Finally made it
Through the lonely
To the other side

You set it again
My hearts in motion
Every word feels
Like a shooting star
I’m at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows
Burning in the dark
And I’m in love
And I’m terrifed
For the first time
And the last time
In my only life

This could be good
Its already better than that
And nothings worse
Than knowing your holding back
I could be all that you need
If you let me try

Repeat Chorus

I only said it ’cause I mean it
Oh I only mean it
‘Couse its true
So dont you tear
What I’ve been dreaming
‘Couse it keeps me up
And holds me close
Whenever Im without you

Repeat Chorus


this song has american idol smeared all over it. Kara DioGuardi co-wrote it, Katherine McPhee has it in her latest album and Didi Benami just did a beautiful cover in the hollywood round.

Didi Benami

Katherine McPhee

this song actually makes me want to grab a guitar and start learning the chords. hmmm… perhaps it isn’t so late to start learning how to play the guitar, eh?

i’m in love. i’m terrified. what is more terrifying then falling-in-love, right? 🙂

Stray Italian Greyhound
Vienna Teng

Oh no not now
Please not now
I just settled into the glass half empty
Made myself at home
And so why now
Please not now
I just stopped believing in happy endings
Harbors of my own

But you had to come along didn’t you
Break down the doors, throw open windows
Oh if you knew just what a fool you have made me

So what do I do with this?

This stray Italian greyhound
These inconvenient fireworks
This ice-cream-covered screaming hyperactive thought
God I just want to lay down
These colors make my eyes hurt
This feeling calls for everything that I am not

I’m not that kind
I’m so good at shooting down any notion
This tired world could change
It’s all been bought
Or at least that was my line
No use in spending all that emotion
When there’s someone else to blame

But you had to come along didn’t you
Rev up the crowd, rewrite the rule book
Where do I go when every ‘no’ turns into ‘maybe’

So what do I do with this?

This sudden burst of sunlight
And me with my umbrella
Cross-indexing every weatherman’s report
I was ready for the downslide
But not for spring to well up
This feeling calls for everything I can’t afford
To know is possible now

What do I do
With a love that won’t sit still
Won’t do what it’s told
What do I do
With a love that won’t sit still


ayn and i were able to get our mom to let us join mimay and her boyfriend mike on a roadtrip to Santa Cruz and San Francisco last weekend. we got tickets to watch Vienna Teng at the Rio Theatre in Santa Cruz, CA. mimay and ayn are big, big fans of hers. i just jumped on the chance to have a few days of freedom from visiting relatives. and mike came along to drive us around.

we had dinner at this pizza place, Tony and Alba’s, where i saw the cutest guy i’ve seen so far since coming here. he was behind the counter and i was too shy to flirt with him. i think i lost my touch with the lack of flirting and alcohol these past few weeks.

The Paper Raincoat opened for her. the band is a collaboration between Alex Wong and Amber Rubarth, both very talented artists. i have a crush on the former. you all know i’m a sucker for a guy with a beautiful voice who could play multiple musical instruments. amazing! hehehe. he also co-produced Vienna Teng’s album with her. i really wanted to have a picture with him after the show but we couldn’t find him in the crowd and we were in a rush to head back to SF already. we got a picture with Vienna Teng though after mimay fibbed a little by telling her we came from the Philippines specifically to watch her perform. hahaha!

here’s a youtube video of a cool a cappella song, “Rewind”, which The Paper Raincoat also performed in the concert we watched…

i’m currently obsessed with…

... victoria's secret lingerie (i really want to buy some and have them shipped here)
... tumblr-ing
... hula-hooping
... learning my old piano pieces again
... expensive stuff i can't afford
... still being kissed ala north & south

That’s the closest to my idea of love: watching the skyline, making out, making mistakes, making believe desire means it’s with somebody else, then breaking up, and, if we’re lucky, forgiveness that comes right before take-off. There, I’ve said it. What more can one want? A lover who loves me as much as the rain. Rain, and, from the opening credits to the closing heart, Gershwin.
~ The Muse This Time by R Zamora Linmark

i love;
...ultimate frisbee;
...the melancholic sound of the cello;
...playing the piano;
...Frederic Chopin, John Williams and Michael Legrand;
...the rain;
...walking in the rain;
...hanging out with my friends;
...being a girly-girl;
...wearing dresses; naturally wavy hair;
...the sound of waves crashing in the shore; and pasta;
...raisin bread;
...Cyrano de Bergarac;;
...Artic Vodka Melon;
...Jose Cuervo Tequila; lomo cameras;
...taking pictures;
...chick flicks that make you believe that finding your one true love is not so impossible; and
...heartwrenchingly beautiful songs that say otherwise

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